Got my driving theory sorted this morning. Rather a waste of time, really. The hazard perception test was dodgy at best; I agree with the idea in principle but they have yet to find a decent way of actually testing your responses to hazards. I passed it, of course, albeit narrowly, yet couldn’t help but feel it wasn’t going to be terribly accurate until Micro$oft buy out the motor industry and replace all steering wheel/brake systems with mice. Admittedly I did spend a grand total of about twenty minutes reading in preparation for that part of the test so perhaps I shouldn’t be complaining…

As for the main body of questions, they were so depressingly obvious that it became quite a temptation to use one of their ridiculous “alternative answers”. Multiple choice is always going to be simple, but frankly if anyone fails to answer correctly most questions of that callibre, I don’t even want them walking near me let alone driving!

Try the quick P-2004 mock driving theory test:

Drinking alcohol before driving…
(a) gives you super powers;
(b) shrinks you (and your car) until you are small enough to fit down the rabbit hole;
(c) slows your reaction speed; or
(d) I am the walrus, goo goo g’joob.

How did you score? Well, I can tell you that you passed? How? Because we’re England and we have to cater for the lowest common denomenator to be fair, and hence we’ll let anyone on our roads. Did you notice how we gave you that Provisional License without verifying your mental stability at all? We just figured it stressed our commitment to equality…